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DUBLIN: Troubled Wallaby Kurtley Beale says his redemption mission is still a work in progress, promising to learn from mistakes and become a better player and person.
Beale's six-week Wallabies' exile ended in Dublin when he came off the bench in the 26-23 defeat to Ireland on Saturday night.
He thanked coach Michael Cheika for giving him a chance to move on from the off-field drama by playing rugby, describing Cheika as a "father figure".
Playing against Ireland was his first chance in Wallabies gold since the investigation into a lewd message to former team business manager Di Patston that Beale described as a "silly thing to do".
But despite all the controversy off the field, Beale says he is focused on the Wallabies and is "very close" to signing a new deal with the ARU a month after the chief executive recommended he be sacked.
Playing against Ireland was the first step for Beale being able to move on by playing rugby and he's likely to get another chance from the bench against England this week.
"I want to learn from my mistakes and keep improving on the little things moving forward to try to better myself as a person," Beale said.
"For me to be able to come into the environment there are a lot of challenges ahead for me personally. I'm just trying to put my head down and do my best for the team. For me I've got to work that little bit extra hard to show the boys I do care and I do want to represent my country.
"Working hard to earn respect [from teammates] and to an extent the Australian rugby community. It's a work in progress but I'm doing everything I can."
Beale almost scored with his first touch against Ireland, latching on to an inside pass from Matt Toomua and cruising into a gaping hole.
But the play was ruled to have been a marginally forward pass and a try-scoring return was put on hold. He showed some signs of being at his best, but he was slightly out of sync with the rest of the team after spending six weeks away from the team.
Beale knows his selection has caused division in Australia. He was fined $45,000 by the ARU and it is to be donated to a female charity.
He turned to mum Kathy and grandmother Norma for support at times when he thought he would never play for Australia again.
"I admit it was a silly mistake, there was no intent to hurt in anyway. It was a silly, stupid, schoolboy prank that I got myself caught up in. All the people in my life who have helped me get to where I am today are all strong women: my mother, my grandmother and my girlfriend.
"There's definitely no disrespect or anything like that towards women. They play an important part in our game and it's important to support that. I'll be doing everything I can to redeem myself in that way. It would be stupid to dwell on things and try to bury yourself. It's important to accept what you did and try to do everything you can to make up for it, and learn from it. I feel like I'm on that track."
Cheika has also shown huge faith in Beale by calling him into the tour squad and declaring he didn't want to play politics with Beale's future. Cheika also took Beale under his wing at the NSW Waratahs when he was sacked by the Melbourne Rebels.
"[Cheika] has played a massive role, almost like a father figure. He showed the faith and belief in me at the start of this year before the Waratahs' season," Beale said. "For someone to give me that opportunity, deep down it's something I need to give back. He was trying to guide me in the right places.
"I've had a fair few indiscretions in the past, I admit that. It's definitely helped me understand the important values in life I need to uphold to be a role model. Especially indigenous kids, I'm a very proud indigenous man and one day I'd like to be that role model."
Beale's manager was in France last week and he's negotiating a new deal with the Waratahs and ARU with his current contract to expire at the end of the year.
ARU boss Bill Pulver and chairman Michael Hawker recommended Beale be sacked to a code of conduct hearing. There was also initial hesitation from officials when Beale was added to the spring tour squad.
"Hopefully I can build a stronger relationship [with Cheika] and work towards something special," Beale said. "Very close [with contract decision], there are still a few things to try to work out so I'm just trying to stay focused on the rugby side of things."
